Dear Diary. Today has been a bad day.

Today began last night, when Girlfriend had a takeaway pizza for dinner and got food poisoning. She was throwing up and rushing to the toilet during the night. In the morning, she felt a bit better now but she still can't eat much.

So I did most of the work of looking after 1-year-old today. I wasn't feeling 100% myself. Not because I ate pizza tainted with human faeces but because I stayed up late last night watching the latest Spider-Man movie. Fucking Spider-Man, it's his fault I'm so tired today. If I see him in person, I'm going to take his web-shooters and stuff them up his cock.

I spent an hour today researching virtual reality headsets. My brother Adam thinks I should open a VR arcade. Then again, what does he know. He's never run a business before.