What if your computer dies one day and you lose all your files? Good heavens! Imagine all the porn and pirated music you'd lose! Well, don't fear - SOS Online Backup is here! This software backs up your PC's contents to the cloud every single day, so your data is always nice, safe and secure. And for only eight bucks a month, how could I refuse? I signed up.

But a mere day later, I changed my mind: I decided to back up with an external hard drive instead, figuring this would be cheaper in the long run. I didn't even use SOS Online Backup in the end, so I have no idea if it's any good.

I asked Infrascale (the company behind the software) to cancel my subscription, and here's where my troubles began.

Issue #1: Thievery

Three months later, I noticed something strange in my PayPal account: Infrascale was still charging me $7.99 a month, despite my subscription being supposedly cancelled! They were charging me for a service I didn't want nor receive. PayPal let me finally cancel my subscription, but Infrascale still owed me two months of wrongful payments - $15.98. The thieving bastards.

Issue #2: They lost my refund request

So I asked Infrascale for a refund. I was told "No problem!” Weeks later, and I was still waiting for my refund. It was as though my conversation had been imaginary.

Issue #3: They failed to keep their promises

So I asked Infrascale again for a refund. And this time they did send me it - but only half, instead of the full $15.98. How strange.

Issue #4: They redirected me to another deparment

Why hadn't they sent the full refund? This mystery had no obvious answer. Beginning to feel desperate, I wrote the following to Infrascale:

A refund of $15.98 was authorized for my account on 17th June 2015. However, I have only been refunded half of this amount. I would like the other $7.99 refunded to my PayPal account.

Pretty reasonable, I think. Here's their reply:

We don't have the billing details for security reasons,

Kindly call billing @ 877 896 3611 x400 or 403 on or after Monday 9AM PST.

Couldn't they have forwarded my email for me? I just wanted my money back WAAAH

Issue #5: They blamed me

So I called the goddamn billing department, and they explained the mystery. PayPal can only refund payments made less than 60 days ago. It's a PayPal policy. And since my refund request was in June, and the payment had been taken in April, this was more than 60 days.

So basically I can't get a refund because I'd been too slow to notice Infrascale's thievery.

"So that's it - there's nothing you can do?" I whimpered to the call centre guy in South Africa.

The guy shrugged. End of the line, kid.

Issue #6: I still don't have my money

I'm writing about my experience so that one day, Infrascale, YES YOU, INFRASCALE, will read this and realise that still owe me $7.99 for the entire month of April 2015 when I didn't use SOS Online Backup, which is probably shit software anyway, but I guess I'll never know because I'll never use your services again. PAY UP, INFRASCALE, YOU BASTARDS. Peace out.

Update: I sent Infrascale a link to this post and surprise surprise, they sent me a refund. As well as five apologetic emails. So remember, kids: bitching on the internet does pay.