Dear Diary. I hurt my lower back at the gym a couple of weeks ago. Nothing serious - I just did some back exercises with poor form. [Note from me five years later: I have no idea what back exercises I'm talking about.] I know swimming is good for the back, so today I went to the swimming pool today at LeisureWorld Churchfield in Cork. [Another note from me five years later: That's Cork, not Cock. Also, I didn't hurt my cock, I hurt my back. Just to clear that up.]

The pool was a 25-minute walk away, and uphill for some of the walk. The weather was pleasant (20 degrees) but a little too hot in the direct sunlight. I was sweating by the time I reached the building.

There was a cool water slide, like the kind at Butlins. The slide ran outside the building and then back in again.

I managed to get a student discount just by claiming I'm a student. She didn't even want to see a student card.

I walked down the corridor and into a changing room. I hadn't seen any signs for the men's changing room and women's changing room, so I didn't know which changing I was in. I hoped I wasn't in the women's changing room mistake. (At the same time, I did hope I was in the women's changing room by mistake, so I could see some boobies and vaginas). Then I saw a fat bald man coming out of a changing cubicle, so I knew I was in the right changing room.

I went into a changing cubicle. There was an amusing sign inside:

In the interest of customer comfort, please remove all items of clothing & personal belongings & avail of the lockers provided. Failure to do so may result in clothes being removed by LeisureWorld staff.

This gave me the erotic image of a sexy LeisureWorld staff member undressing me against my will.

I couldn't find my goggles. I was sure I'd put them in my backpack.

I got in the pool and started swimming. I had to swim without my goggles, which was annoying, as the chlorine goes in my eyes. There was a girl in a revealing bikini who I tried not to stare at.

A water aerobics class started. There was a group of about twenty old fat women in the pool who were following the directions of an instructor. The class involved moving to music (e.g. Mambo number 5). One of the lifeguards - a fat, bald, bearded guy (why were all the people in this pool fat and/or bald?) started dancing along. Then a kid with Downes syndrome came out of the changing room and he started dancing along too. Then he jumped into the pool, even though there was a sign that said 'no diving'. The instructor and lifeguard smiled and shared a look that said, "Downes kids will be Downes kids".

The class ended and the swimming pool began to wind down. My mind kept returning to the water slide. All the kids had gone home and no one was using it anymore. It was a slide of my childhood. I hadn't been on a water slide in over a decade. I got out of the pool and, as I passed the slide, I saw there was a fence blocking the entrance. The water slide was closed. Damn it.

I went into the changing rooms and my suspicions were confirmed: the changing rooms were unisex. No, they weren't the fun unisex changing rooms like how I imagine they are in the ones in Scandinavian countries, where you can see the bare tits and pussy of stunning blonde models. Instead, here, the women got changed in cubicles, as did the men. It was just that these cubicles were all in the same room. Unfortunately, the most skin I saw was from an old wrinkly woman wearing nothing but a towel. Still, I got a sexual thrill knowing that women were changing in the cubicles around me. Also, I got to experience what life is like in a woman's changing room. It turns out that women talk a lot in the changing room. Talk talk talk, about this and that, about prescriptions and problems with their family.